Kristin Pr
I know that typically the brides family pays for the wedding and the grooms family pays for the rehersal dinner and during the rehersal dinner gifts are given form the bride and groom to the wedding party and parents. What if the bride and groom are paying for everything? Do we still give gifts to our parents (as far as ettiqutte goes)? We are also moving into a new home right before the wedding so our money for extras is limited. We have purchased gifts for my bridesmaid and his best man but werent sure about gifts for the parents. Any advice would be great. Thanks.
Answer
Typically gifts for the parents are a way of saying "thank you" for giving us the wedding. If you are paying for your own wedding, then gifts for the parents aren't necessary and shouldn't be expected. It's a nice gesture -but if you can't afford it then don't worry about it. I'm getting married and my fiance and I are paying for everything - my mother is on a fixed income and I don't expect monetary help from her, but she is in charge of interviewing and choosing the caterer - therefore I am getting her a gift. If your or his parents are helping at all, whether monetary or doing some of the leg-work, then you should try to eek out a small token. Goodluck.
Typically gifts for the parents are a way of saying "thank you" for giving us the wedding. If you are paying for your own wedding, then gifts for the parents aren't necessary and shouldn't be expected. It's a nice gesture -but if you can't afford it then don't worry about it. I'm getting married and my fiance and I are paying for everything - my mother is on a fixed income and I don't expect monetary help from her, but she is in charge of interviewing and choosing the caterer - therefore I am getting her a gift. If your or his parents are helping at all, whether monetary or doing some of the leg-work, then you should try to eek out a small token. Goodluck.
unwanted gift from parents?
I already know what my parents are giving me and it's something I don't believe in because it's made with feathers and I'm an animal activist. I live with them so I can't just pretend to like it and return it. If I accept it I'll never be able to live with myself. Also, sometimes they get kind of mad about how I won't eat meat and stuff so I'm scared and I don't know how to tell them that I don't feel comfortable with it.
Answer
If this is a holiday gift, try not to be upset when you open it... especially if your parents are not the only ones there. If you make a scene Christmas morning, it will only make people feel uncomfortable.
Once you're alone with your parents, bring it up casually.
Say, "Mom, Dad, I really appreciate the thought behind your gift, and it's sweet that you wanted me to have that, but I'm worried about the ethics behind accepting this gift. I know you wouldn't harm an animal on purpose, but some people do, and I just can't accept this. Is it okay with you if I return this and get something we can both agree on?"
Be calm toward your parents, and respectful of their generosity, but be firm in your position against animal cruelty. You and your parents may not see eye to eye all the time, but at least you can all be civilized.
Best of luck, and here's to hoping for a kind resolution.
If this is a holiday gift, try not to be upset when you open it... especially if your parents are not the only ones there. If you make a scene Christmas morning, it will only make people feel uncomfortable.
Once you're alone with your parents, bring it up casually.
Say, "Mom, Dad, I really appreciate the thought behind your gift, and it's sweet that you wanted me to have that, but I'm worried about the ethics behind accepting this gift. I know you wouldn't harm an animal on purpose, but some people do, and I just can't accept this. Is it okay with you if I return this and get something we can both agree on?"
Be calm toward your parents, and respectful of their generosity, but be firm in your position against animal cruelty. You and your parents may not see eye to eye all the time, but at least you can all be civilized.
Best of luck, and here's to hoping for a kind resolution.
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